Everybody strap in, I'm 'bout to open some fuckin'
windows nostalgia. Prepare for more language too.
That's right, we're going to pretend that the Holy Grail of all sandboxes, the Lord of all GTA,
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, came out two years earlier than it did so that it will qualify for this thread.
Have a fuckin' picture of this shit: it'll make your day! (Shit's wallpaper-size, too. You know you want it.)
big smoke.jpg
This game was my childhood. Most kids spent their days outside on swings or some shit, or playing basketball. Well I was never the athletic kid, nor the one who spent his days out in the sun (just kidding, it rains to all hell where I live); I was Carl Johnson. Born 'n' raised in Los Santos, I escaped to Liberty City to get away from the heat of my Grove Street hood. But once I caught wind of my mother's death I flew back down to San Andreas and into the shitstorm that is
GTA: SA.
From the moment Carl's feet hit the ground in Los Santos, corrupt C.R.A.S.H. Officers Tenpenny and Pulaski (voiced by Samuel L. Jackson and Chris Penn, respectively) are on his ass to do their dirty work once again, just as it was before Carl left. But after he's been released from the grip of C.R.A.S.H.'s oh-so-hospitable finest, I spent my first few hours playing this game exploring part of one of the biggest game worlds I had ever seen, and getting acquainted with the locals.
Despite his standing later on in the game (no spoilers here), I hold particularly fond memories of Melvin Harris, AKA Carl's childhood friend Big Smoke (pictured above). From the moment I met Big Smoke, I couldn't get enough of him. Though missions including him toward the game's opening were nothing special, I remember them as having some of the best dialogue - my favorites were as follows: Big Smoke's lines in an early mission in which you take him to get some food from Burger Shot, where he rambles off order after order and then complains, "Damn it, CJ, you got ketchup all over the seat!" if you take the next corner too quickly; and "All we had to do was follow the damn train, CJ," if you failed a later mission dubbed
Wrong Side of the Tracks.
Surprisingly, I didn't get very far along in the storyline in spite of years spent playing San Andreas; only when I returned two or so years ago did I finally finish it and appreciate the mastery that was Rockstar's earlier work. However, most of my best memories in this game were contained in Los Santos, the most metropolitan area in the game and the only one that is immediately available to the player. My brother and I compiled a binder full of cheat codes, adding them as we discovered them, and wreaked havoc upon the LSPD and the city's civilians. I remember one that maxed out Carl's weight stat, leading to some very amusing shenanigans riding around town on a bicycle.
Anyway, I shouldn't bore you all more than I already have. Hopefully this has been something of a fun read.
Much love,
Afly
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